I work as a speech-language pathologist in schools as well as in an office with individuals. Part of the job requires me to test or “screen” children before initiating therapy. While I don’t love evaluation, it is a necessary part of the job and reveals information that is necessary for helping out.
One of the tests has an item where a child has to answer a question about this sentence; “Sometimes trees grow in rocks.”
We all come from somewhere.
Whether you think of your home, your home town, or the region where you were born and raised, you come from somewhere.
I know people who wear their hometown like a badge of honor. They are proud of their community and maybe even continue living there. Growing up in the United States, I take pride in being American and believe that this is the best place to live.
When does this pride become something in which we need to be more aware?
I am not saying that pride in one’s hometown or one’s country is bad, what I am saying is that when we focus on one thing too much, when we let one aspect of ourselves outweigh others, we risk become too one-sided.
I don’t need to go into some political argument about partisanship and how politicians don’t see other points of view. I am more concerned with myself (and how others think too).
There is something to be said for single-mindedness of purpose. I admire people who are devoutly focused on their goals and the principles. I consider myself too wishy-washy with these areas of my life and am working to adhere more strongly to what I consider to be right. It’s easy to bend at times, especially when you don’t want to make waves.
On the other hand, single-mindedness can lead to faulty thinking at times. There is a distinct possibility that you are not always right; the awareness of this concept can go a long way.
Trees may grow in rocks, but they are not made of stone. You may grow up in a town, but you are not a place. You may grow up in a home in which certain beliefs were indoctrinated into your mindset.
None of this means you are beyond change and stagnant in your life. Awareness of your opinions is a foundation. Knowing that you can change parts of your mindset is the structure for growth over time.
This is where mindfulness training and meditation become critical for development. I would never tout that I am an expert. My practice has waxed and waned for years, but I come back. The insights I gain from sitting quietly for 10 minutes have been more than I can count.
The ability to focus on one thing: Meditation and mindfulness allow me to sharpen my focus on breath or a body part while trying to ignore other thoughts. These thoughts bubble up like boiling water. The goal is not to stop the thoughts but rather to maintain focus on the breath or the feel of your fingers touching.
When you consider your own thoughts and views, this ability to focus is important. You shift your focus from what you think you think- it’s less about your perceptions or the story you tell yourself and more about the actions.
When considering change, this is a crucial distinction. Our memories and perceptions of our memories change over time. There is research to show that what we think our memories are in fact are shaped by our current experience. In this way, we are as strong or resilient as we are now. Whereas our memories of our strength and resilience are part of the equation, how we perceive and interpret ourselves in the moment play a role as well.
By focusing on one thing at a time, we can make appreciable change. We can transcend the rock we have grow in, we can become the people that we want to be, and we can change.
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As always, I give credit to the ideas from Daily Zen for inspiring my journey into mindfulness and for his incredibly detailed deconstructions of thought and behavior.
