Conflict as a Educator: How to Learn from Every Disagreement

Dan Fitch
2 min readAug 8
Photo by Christina @ on Unsplash


The word alone brings up so much emotion for me.

-Times when I chose to engage in disagreement. Times when I walked away.

-The inverse of both- times when I engaged and should’ve walked, and of course times I walked away and should’ve engaged.

There are some people in my life who know all about conflict. They almost embrace going toe to toe with someone else. These people think of the retort and the hole in someone’s argument.

Instead, I am in the shower the next day replaying a conversation and saying what was really on my mind.

I don’t know where it comes from- but I do know this. All conflict can be seen as a learning experience.

“When you catch an elbow or an unfair blow today, shake off the pain and remind yourself: I’m learning. My sparring partner is learning too. This is practice for both of us-that’s all.”

-Ryan Holiday and Stephen Hanselman; “Daily Stoic”

Photo by Darius Bashar on Unsplash

Instead of seeing conflict as something to be embraced or avoided, I can see it as a learning experience. I can celebrate times when I made the best choice for that moment, and I can learn from the times I didn’t make the best choice.

Keep this in mind when you’re replaying that last argument in the shower, or when you’re beating yourself up for speaking out at a time that wasn’t the best.

You’re learning. You can learn more.

You can apply old lessons finally. You can be a better version of yourself.

Dan Fitch

Helping kids communicate is my day job. Wading through my thoughts to get them out here.